I’ve been pulled back

An idea is like a virus. Resilient. Highly contagious. And even the smallest seed of an idea can grow. It can grow to define or destroy you. Cobb, Inception.

The last few weeks, I struggled with an idea. The idea of humanism. As a psychology student, I am exposed with many ideas and theories about human. But this peculiar idea, humanism, stuck in my head and began to spread to many aspects of my life like a virus. Belief that human can reach it’s best with efficacy-Bandura, belief that human can enhance with unconditional positive regards through empathy-Rogers, and many others.

I didn’t aware until some point I felt so empty because I didn’t feel God anymore. When it happened, I began to realize that I actually felt God as a human and not as, God. Unconsciously, I see God as someone who listened and empathized but not more than that. And I could find listeners and empathizers through my friends, thus I searched less for God. Unconsciously, I started to forget that God has the power and authority to control. I became anxious for I felt far from God. At that point, I struggled and I asked what had happened to myself. The more I struggle, the more was I concerned with my thoughts. I asked God to show himself, so I can feel him mentally and, for the first time, physically too.

With all the priming I received, at last I was enlightened.

Enlightened by today’s devotion. For although they knew God, they neither glorified him as God nor gave thanks to him, but their thinking became futile and their foolish hearts were darkened-Romans 1:21. I wondered why I struggled with that idea of humanism and the answer is simple, because it believes in human’s greatness. Unconsciously, I set aside God’s greatness and that was the core of my distortion.

Enlightened by JN’s sharing yesterday about spiritual garden. Gary Thomas’ idea is everyone has their own ways to reach spirituality. Looking at nine pathways given (naturalist, sensate, traditionalist, ascetic, activist, caregiver, enthusiast, contemplative and intellectual), I believed mine is strongest through sensation. As I looked back, I got a lot of sensation from human lately, which strengthened the idea of humanism.

Enlightened by yesterday’s preaching. “Don’t take sensation of unbelief too seriously, take God seriously” quoted from Barth, ST preached that spirituality is vivid, felt thoroughly by our body and our mind intertwined.

Knowing all this, I became aware of myself. Of what my senses might perceive, of what an idea might fill. And I learned to trust God once again, deeper by feel him, with not just my mind but my body and senses as well.

God have pulled me back, and now I give in all the glory to him.

Arren and Therru

Just watched another Ghibli movie which once again reminds us to be more concern with earth’s health; Gedo Senki or Tales from Earthsea in English (click picture below to watch).

TfE title

** SPOILERS **

In that world, one should keep his real name because anybody can control others by having their real names.

Also, that world was then unbalanced because humans had exploited the earth without restoring it. Dragons, which lived in air and fire, had appeared in humans’ territorry, which is earth and sea. This is just one of the effects of the disturbance of the balance.

*

And so, there was a boy, prince, called Arren who stabbed his own father, the king. Arren proclaimed that he was not himself but as if someone’s inside him controlling him; and this self appeared again when Arren tried to save Therru.

TfE Arren

Arren when saving Therru

Therru, a girl with a burn scar on her face. It’s been said that she was abused by her parents when little, the scar was a proof. Therru had been living for 5 years with Tenar who adopted her.

TfE Therru

Arren when saving Therru

TfE journey

Sparrowhawk and Arren

Tenar was a friend of Sparrowhawk, the most powerful wizard, aka Archmage. Sparrowhawk was on his journey to restore balance in that world. He met Arren in his journey and had been taking after him ever since. Sparrowhawk and Arren lived in Tenar’s house for awhile.

 

TfE Cob

Cob

 

 

And then there was Cob, a wizard who searched for eternal life. By means to obtain it, Cob disturbed the balance in the world.

*

Aside of the main plot of restoring balance in the world, this movie had another significant message for me. That is, to face our own self and accept it as they are.

Arren first feared of his ownself and rejected the darkness within him, and by doing that rejecting the light as well. However you look at it, light will not exist without darkness and darkness will not exist without light. Arren had became empty by that time. Therru confronted and challenged Arren to face his fear.

Arren, they’ve got Tenar and Sparrowhawk. They’ll die if we don’t do something! They’ll die! We’ll lose both of them! We’ll lose the most important thing in the world.

Therru, what is the most important thing?

Life is the most important thing.

We’ll all die someday. What does it matter?

Why fight for life? We know it’s going to end anyway.

No! Life is precious because we know we’re going to die!

TfE Therruarren

You’re afraid to live the only life you have!

Therru..

You think your life belongs to you?

Tenar gave me life. That’s why I have to live to give life to someone else.

TfE Lebannen

That’s the only way we live forever.

Who the hell was Lebannen? See for yourself in the movie XD

***

Would Arren accept the challenge? Would he accept his whole self? Would he live?

and..

will I accept the same challenge, to accept my whole self and live?

Will you?

 

Watch “Hayao Miyazaki – The Essence of Humanity” on YouTube

Some of Miyazaki’s works are my favorite! Today I just found how Miyazaki thinks about his anime movies, never thought he’d think that far. Very inspiring indeed 🙂

View on Path

Through a glass, darkly

Another wonderful philosophic novel from Jostein Gaarder which once again opened my eyes for another angle to see.

cecilia-55c2ddba13ef6

This novel tells you about a point of view you wouldn’t imagine before, an angel. The story was wonderfully plotted  using the interaction of a very sick girl and her “guardian” angel. Well, it was of course just a possibility that angel really think like that, but hey, it was really enjoyable and beyond my imagination. A very intriguing part is Gaarder chose the base from a verse in the Bible;

1 Corinthians 13:12

For now we see only a reflection as in a mirror, then we shall see face to face. Now I know in part, then I shall know fully, even as I am fully known.

The novel made me think about how small and limited our knowledge is. Yes, limited to our own senses. Therefore, our mind will just see and think from our sense’s perspective. I thought about how if we think outside our perspective, and I remembered the movie “Interstellar” where humans would perceive 5 dimensions and not just 3. It’s so interesting to watch movies like that. Let’s just see what will happen next, I guess with the development of the technologies, that might just happen in the future!

Nausicaa; what a Princess

 A few days ago, I watched this very old yet modern, fantasy movie from my favorite anime movie producer, Hayao Miyazaki. As you can see, the title is… Kaze no Tani no Naushika

nausicaa

Created in 1984, the technologies in the film are as good, or even better than techs nowadays. Hayao’s really good in air technologies and it could also be seen in this movie. The story plotted when earth was so polluted, some places had too much toxic in air that people must wear masks in those territory. The worst part polluted is the forest Sea of Decay; it’s been told that toxic come from there and take life from villages around it. Insects live there and they go rage (eyes red) if people wanted to destroy the forest.

Princess Nausicaa of the Valley of the Wind was loved by her people and also by the insects in the Sea of Decay. It was peaceful until Tolmekian people attacked the Valley of the Wind and took Nausicaa for their plan destroying the Sea of Decay. Pejite people then involved also in this conflict; they too, wanted to destroy the Sea of Decay. Nausicaa wanted to save her people and the Sea of Decay -moreover after she had found out the secret of the forest-, but could she do it?

***

This movie is very touching and interesting to watch. Although it’s an old anime, but the animation and technologies are not bad, not bad at all. And above all, its message was clear and very related to our life 🙂 So, I really recommend you to watch it XD